By Popular Request – A. Bertram Chandler and More Harlan Ellison

I’ve added links to the A. Bertram Chandler stories that are hosted on the official A. Bertram Chandler website.

I’ve got a lot more to add – there’s scifi.com’s archives and a few other places. (Some free magazines are already up – Raygun Revival, Tor, Subtarranean Press) and lots more to come.

***

In light of the ‘is sci fi dying?’ roundtable, and via SFSignal Harlan Ellison reminds us of what science fiction is and what it isn’t: more

Read Full Post »

More Mish Mash

Click the pic to WATCH the original

Bill the SciFi guy has an excellent piece commenting on Biology in SF’s poll concerning the intersection between science and science fiction. This is an academic exercise and pretty straight forward – until you get to IO9′s butting in on the subject.

Read about more stupidity! Look at pics of almost nekkid ladies! Watch village idiots looking at pictures of nekkid ladies!

Read Full Post »

NO NO NO NO DEAR GOD IN HEAVEN NOT AGAIN NO NO NO NONONONONONONO!

Straczynski, we love you but

NO NO NO NO NO!

YET ANOTHER REMAKE OF A (ALREADY PERFECT) 50S FILM!?!?!?!?!

The Hollywood Reporter is reporting that J. Michael Stracynski has been hired to write the script for a (barfing in my mouth) remake of the science fiction epic film of epic films – FORBIDDEN PLANET.

The one based on J. William Shakespeare’s script – The Tempest.

(What the hell is it with the Hollywood J’s? The Jays are invading and remaking everything!)

Whay can’t we wait a century for remakes – why does it have to be every half century (or in some case once every other week…)?

WHY THE FUCK CAN’T WE LEAVE WELL ENOUGH ALONE!

Here’s an idea. If you’re current crop of Hollywood A list ideators can’t come up with new ideas that are good enough to make into movies and tv shows – GET RID OF THEM!

OR – I’ll bet just about anything I own that people like J. Michael have a file somewhere that’s just spilling over with original scripts they’ve been trying to find a market for.

AND – if that’s not good enough for some bizarre Hollywood logic reason, there are companies like TOR and ACE and PYR that have these little paper things called books, written by these strange little people called science fiction authors, and they keep on writing and publishing those book things every day, and every single one of them is an ORIGINAL FUCKING IDEA!

How about giving them some attention and a little cash, huh?

Look, I don’t begrudge J. Michael his paycheck – and I’ll bet he’s pretty excited about the challenge he’s just accepted (all the best and please do a really good job – the kind we’ve come to expect from you) – but I know, deep in my heart of hearts (whatever the hell that means) that you’d much rather be spending your time creating your own characters, universes and adventures. I know protest is futile – if you’d said ‘no’, they’d just hire some hack to churn this thing out – but aren’t you getting sick of the mentality? (Maybe not, probably depends on the word rate…)

Monsters from the Id indeed…

Read Full Post »

LOST Not FOUND

I’m probably committing sacrilege with every word in this post, but sticking my finger in the eye of conventional wisdom seems to be a ‘thing’ with me.

Skiffy Tube has begun its long anticipated re-run of the JJ Abrams wonder show LOST and I accidentally got drawn in to watching it.

I was not drawn in by the wonderousness of the show, nor was I captivated by the splendiferous acting of the ensemble cast.  My experience was more like that of the extra who got sucked in to the turbine.

In other words, it literally sucked.  And then it splashed bloody little fleshy pieces all over the landscape.

What initially attracted me was an incessant rising and falling jet engine whine.  The TV was running in the other room (I rarely watch the bloody thing) and somehow it managed to find itself set to Skiffy Tube.  I was finally annoyed enough to leave the keyboard.  Once I realized that I had a chance to watch LOST from the beginning, I decided to leave it on and settled in to watch the first few episodes to see what all the moaning was about.

First I’ll say this.  How the Sci Fi Channel expects to keep an audience with 4+ minutes of commercials between a scant ten minutes of program is way beyond my powers of intellectual analysis.  First they turn off their core audience, then they blatantly ignore their new audience’s complete lack of attention span.  WTF?  Even I had trouble remembering what I was watching. 

This kind of thing only makes sense if you assume that the SICs real plan is to run the channel into the ground. If I were an investor, I’d hire one of those forensic accountants and have him do some forensicing. This might be one of those Zero Mostel ‘Producers’ deals…

Anyway, to get back to LOST.  Maybe I have just too damned much experience with movies, television shows and literature, but I found the whole thing A: boring, B: easily anticipated and C: stupid.

I will not be hanging on the edge of my seat to find out what happens next because I already know: the stereotyped characters will fulfill their roles as competent young doctor, snivelling coward, blonde bimbo, creepy guy, jolly fat man, cute young kid and such.  They’ll all do stupid, non-sensical, panicky things, fights will break out when the action slows down and the fright moments will be telegraphed from ten miles away.

That this is what passes for a blockbuster television show from the creative genius savior of television drama reminds me, sadly, of the fact that television audiences get what they deserve and what they can handle.  Which these days appears to be – not much.

Just a few examples from the first couple of episodes to illustrate my point:

The doctor, the Felon and the Drug Addict make their way the jet’s cockpit to retrieve the transceiver.  There they discover the Pilot still alive and are menaced by the GIANT SHADOW.  The Pilot, who could barely move, the one who’s been unconscious for 16 hours, STICKS HIS HEAD OUT THE BROKEN COCKPIT WINDOW and is, of course, immediately sucked out to oblivion, accompanied by screams and raining blood.

Don’t be embarrassed.  Raise your hand if this took you by surprise.  I knew the moment the pilot gasped his first fright-take gasp that he was a goner, and the moment I saw the broken cockpit window I knew he was gonna get sucked out of it. Double cliche. Boring.

THEN, everyone runs away from the comparative safety of the fuselage interior.  Riiiiiiight.  Call me a snivelling coward, but.  When there is a giant shadow-thing lurking in the jungle and you’re inside a cave, stay in the cave.  There was no compelling reason for the characters to leave. Sheer idiocy.  Boring.

Later, the Muslim manages to repair the transceiver and there is much anxiety over a fading battery.  Maybe this was some kind of oblique commentary on the  bankruptcy of Muslim extremism or something, but I think it was just poor writing.  If you can repair a transceiver, you can remove the battery or disconnect the leads.  When the battery is disconnected, the little demons inside can’t get out. Dumb. Boring.

The battery thing put the capper on this show for me. If the survivors are that stupid, there’s no point in rescuing them.  And no point in continuing to watch this poor excuse of a fantasy thriller.

Read Full Post »

Early Morning Review

1. I’m sick and tired (already) of the LHC.  Actually, not so much the collider itself as I am the idiots who are running scared from it, and actually not so much the idiots themselves as the sad fact that we live in a world where their idiocies can gain traction.  Given the random nature of quantum physics, maybe we’ll be lucky enough to roll a double 6 and mini-black holes will appear inside the heads of the nay-sayers, suck what few brain cells they have out of their craniums and then evaporate.

If these people really want to worry about Earth-destroying cataclismic events, there’s a whole list of REAL things they can concern themselves with – some of which are preventable/avoidable, but of course we don’t have the funding for said prevention/avoidance because the idiots don’t ‘believe’ in them.

2. Edward M. Lerner, way-cool co-author (with Larry Niven) of the new Known Space series of novels (Fleet of Worlds, Juggler of Worlds coming soon, already discounted 8 bucks on Amazon), author in his own right of fine, SCIENCE – based science fiction, has started his own blog.

Much like the LHC, he’s tackling fundamental questions about life, the universe and everything. One entry offers an overview of the Fermi Paradox, while another looks at an even deeper, more complex problem: the graying of fandom.

3. Wil Wheaton discovers (and wears) THE COOLEST T-SHIRT IN THE WORLD! I’m getting one, ‘WOO WOO WOO’. Take a look at that design and tell me you can’t hear the SFX it invokes.

I’m telling the Overlords at Ray Gun Revival - you MUST license this shirt.  Or at least buy a half-dozen and give them away in some kind of contest.

4. The Mayor of Berwyn Heights, MD, FORMER owner of those dogs murdered by a rabid SWAT team(who, along with his wife had to sit in handcuffs watching while their dogs bled to death) is finally speaking out.  I can’t imagine anything more horrible (not the speaking out – the murder) than knowing that your pets have been sacrificed in the name of (bad) SWAT training.

Read Full Post »

A Parade of Dragons

Via the email list that SHALL NOT BE NAMED – the DragonCon Parade video, courtesy of  Isaac Alexander.

Also Pac*Fen’s Denvention interviews are now up.

Gotta make my wife’s lunch before we leave for work, so I can’t critique right now – but – comparing the two – I’d much rather have been at Denvention this year.

***

Lunch is made (more on ‘stupid’ sandwiches later): turkey and cheese on pumpernickel with spicy mustard.

Brian Richards (I think) announces and does some crowd interviews at the beginning of the annual geek parade at DragonCon.

He starts out well but – dude. When you’re interviewing, like, have your questions ready. And have MORE questions than you have airtime for cause, you know, some people are camera shy and others sometimes give really short, annoying, unresponsive answers and you might just have to fill a few seconds.

As for the parade?  Can’t watch it. Seriously.  Yes, I’m an SF fan and have grown used to seeing people in strange costumes walking the streets in daylight, but…

I’m sorry, but the whole thing just makes me laugh and reminds me of the days when people used to have to hide their science fiction magazines inside brown paper bags or textbooks in order to avoid public ostracism.

Look, I know that costumery is a big thing with some fans and represents an ‘ultimate’ expression of their love for and immersion in a particular fantasy world, but every time I see this kind of thing, one and only one image pops into my head:

I was attending a Star Trek con in 1976, sitting quietly in the hotel lobby pouring over my recent ascquisitions from the Huckster’s room, when not one but TWO ‘Captain Kirks’ went running by (mustard yellow command shirts emblazoned with embroidered medals), shooting each other with water pistol phasers and each declaring themselves individually to be the ‘real’ Captain Kirk.

I’d estimate they were both in their mid-thirties. The thinning hair and pot bellies kind of, sort of, lent the lie to their declarations.

I packed my stuff up and headed for home. The following month I attended my first REAL Science Fiction convention.

***

Speaking of REAL cons (you know, the ones where the work is more important than the actors, where someone isn’t trying to make a buck off of your geekdom, where the average age is ‘mature’ and the average intelligence of the participants actually shows up on a graph), J.C. of Pac*Fen finally posted various interviews conducted at Denvention 3, the 2008 Worldcon (where they give out the important awards called Hugos and Campbells and…).

He’s got bits with Harry Turtledove, Kevin Standlee (WSFS IP Poobah and master of all things statistical *breathe* and co-creator of the SFAwardsWatch website), Phil Foglio (hi Phil! – I’m still keeping watch over the Keeber Factory), Francis Hamit, Jim Strickland, David Boop and Marc Zicree.

Zicree’s interview (who? – TV writer/director/Hugo nominee) is actually kind of interesting, as are the others.  Give em a listen.

Read Full Post »

The Top 10 WORST Things That Could Happen To Planet Earth

The article you are looking for can be found HERE on the new version of my blog.

Please update your RSS feed.  Thank you.

Read Full Post »

To Make Gay Marriage Legal in CA – Vote FOR The Ban

Rick Moen is working on this piece that compares Kudzu (that asian vine that’s choking the South) with legislative proposals that seek to ban gay marriage – particularly the California ballot initiative that’s coming up.

The essay itself contains some interesting links as well – items worth perusing if this whole issue doesn’t strike you as religious zealotry trying to shove its way down your throat.

Rick’s piece highlights the amazing genetic diversity that is the human race, and points out that, by virtue of the manner in which our genes get together to make US, the California Proposal could very well result in legalizing marriages between “same sex” couples.

This results from the fact that physical appearance, identification, sex organs and even fertility can be misleading, once we begin to look into all of the genetic ‘anomolies’ that can crop up.  (A man may be a man, function as a man, identify as a man and yet be genetically female – without the prerequisite of a sex change operation.)

I just love it when reality – uncovered and revealed in all its glory through the wonders of scientific investigation – confounds the bible thumpers. 

Defense of (traditional) marriage acts are nothing more than the religiously inspired trying to make non-believers toe their line.  As this site (referenced in Moen’s piece) illustrates, most of the arguments against gay marriage, when rendered for clarity, come down to ‘my god says’.

I’m always fascinated by the disconnect that occurs at this juncture: why can’t they see that what ‘your god says’ wasn’t heard because YOUR god wasn’t talking to ME.  YOUR god doesn’t talk to a lot of people.  In fact, YOUR god isn’t talking to MOST of the people.  They’re listening to someone else and the messages are not the same. (Full disclosure: no gods have ever talked to me – or I wasn’t paying attention, which isn’t surprising considering the mess at least one of them supposedly made for me to live in.)

I see it as a problem with a simple solution: they want to believe gay marriage is bad – don’t marry someone of the same sex.  Of course THEY don’t see it that way.  Live and let live – despite its biblical origins – is apparently not a growth strategy.

***

Science Fiction content here?  Hmmm, let’s see.  Rick is a fan and a member of the email list WHO’S NAME SHALL NOT BE MENTIONED.  Gender, sexual identity and illicit sex  are popular genre themes.  (Speaking of which, if you had sex with an alien who’s sex was identitifed as the same as yours, would it be defined as homosexual sex?  Bestiality? Rishathra?)  The genre is supposed to appeal to those with open minds and a bit of intelligence, and because, if we were living in the right kind of world, the only place you’d find something as dunderheaded, illogical and insane as the CA Marriage proposal would be in a science fiction story.  (And it would be the bad guys proposing it…)

Read Full Post »

THE CONCLUSION OF PULP COMIC FAIRY TALE!

Now at long last, thrill to the exciting, fantabulous and awe-inspiring conclusion of PULP COMIC FAIRY TALE!

Don’t miss out on a single episode of this galaxy-spanning rollercoaster ride of intrigue, love and betrayal!

PULP COMIC FAIRY TALE – “is a stunning display of science fiction stereotypes and genre tropes” – Iasi Mov, Trantor Literary Review; “I laughed so hard coffee came out of my nose!” - Anson MacDonald, HK Luna Free Press; “Absolutely STUNNING! artwork” Frankrp Aul, Amazing Heavy Metal Stories.

Read Full Post »

More SMOF Secrets?

Hey – maybe SFAwards Watch and IO9 will want to pick up on this one:

Glyer reveals in File 770 that the Secret Masters of Fandom have been talking about something called SCOOTERS.

I haven’t puzzled out the entire acronym, but I’m pretty sure that the first two letters stand for Secret Code.

Mike cleverly conceals whatever hidden message there is to be found in his entry by placing SCOOTERS into the context of a supposed conversation about handicap access at conventions. Of course, we have no real idea of what he’s talking about because the message itself can only be found on the SMOFs reading list which is, you know, kind of SECRET.

I’d really like to know what this passage is code for -

“So the problem for the Worldcon is not the expense, but having to front the money…”

Could this have anything to do with Hugo voting restrictions? Front the money from whom, to whom and for what?  It’s further illuminated by this later passage -

“Denconvention seems to have given that help to fans who planned in advance. The question really is what future Worldcons should provide for these last-minute needs, if anything.”

Fronting money?  ‘Help’ to fans? Could Worldcon be paying fans to join so that they’ll “vote the right way” come Hugo Awards time? 

I’m thinking that the ‘advanced planning’ referenced in the above means ‘smart enough and connected enough’ to get on the SMOFs list. So that you can request a payout.

Don’t believe me when I say something is up? Check this out:

“The best suggestion I saw in the recent discussion on the Smofs list was Sharon Sbarsky’s idea…

(Sharon) “…If the idea catches on, then more spare scooters could be rented.”

‘Spare Scooters’ indeed.  Don’t need the code book for that one! But in case you do – ‘spare scooters’ is obviously the insider’s outlandishly punny name for ‘non-worldcon-attending fans’ and ‘renting’ is the stand-in for buying their vote…

You could check me on all of this, but you’d need to be a SMOF to get at the source material, and we’re all sworn to secrecy…

Read Full Post »