SFCrowsnest has a group over at facebook. Its here.
I’m not a big social networker. Not even in RL. (Reading and writing are pretty ANTI-social. Besides, I’m set in my ways, like to do things my own way, in my own time, don’t want to hear anyone else’s comments on how or why I do things the way I do them and more often than not find the company of my wife, my cat and my dog to be more than sufficient. Those three rarely, if ever, tell me what to do or how to do it. And that’s a lie, but they don’t really count as people because they’re the wife, the cat and the dog.)
Despite my anti-social behavior, I’ve gone and opened up a facebook AND a myspace account, which I’ll link to shortly.
John Gardner wrote that he was a gregarious loner. I’ve always thought that’s the perfect definition for a writer, and I’ve shamelessly stolen that line and use it on my resume’ (I’m a technical writer and Help author for my day job). That’s one of the first questions in every interview I have, a great ice breaker.
Technical writers are basically liaisons between technical developers (engineers, programmers, and so forth) and an end-user audience. I love spending part of my day around people, trading information, asking questions, sharing feedback, and otherwise doing professional and personal networking. But when it comes time to write, I need to put on some good headphones and escape into my virtual cave where I’m all alone. I need that time when I’m not interacting with anyone in person for my mental health and my writing productivity.
For me, lunch is the time for my mental health sanctuary. I eat alone and read every day at lunch. People who I was actively chatting with during the day used to stop by my table at lunch, and I would politely nod in their direction and go back to my book. Friendly acquaintances would sometimes pull of a chair across from me. I’d nod and maybe say “Hey,” just to be agreeable. And then I’d look back at my book and lose myself in the text again. It can be a little socially queasy for those not used to my pattern, but my lunchtime is critical for my sanity, and I guard that time jealously. (It’s different if I’d actively agreed to lunch plans – I’m not /completely/ anti-social, but if I haven’t set something up specifically, it’s the one time of day I will be a man of few words, polite but deliberately distant. I need that time to be effective in the afternoon, and that’s that.)
So, yeah, there’s nothing wrong with knowing who you are and what makes you tick.
Hey Johne.
Nice routine.
Of course, its not that I’m really anti-social. A better way to describe it is, I prefer to pick and control the times that I’ll be social. Never did like loud, raucous, beery parties. (Small, intimate beery parties are a thing of the past.)
Used to love the consuite at conventions though – but then, most fans know enough to realize when they’re getting loud and obnoxious (which is far different from the non-alcohol induced obnoxiousness often found at conventions).
But then, I liked a quiet hall corridor and a corner I could sit in and read too.
I do think it has a lot to do with being comfortable with yourself. It seems to me that a lot of people are ’social’ because they can’t spend quality time with themselves.
But then again, Niven did say that the culture determines sanity, so on that score…